ACNC Registered Charity

Meet the BBQ Host: Jimmy Hayes

Mr. Perfect will be regularly featuring a short interview with our BBQ Hosts from right across Australia. These humans are pivotal in their communities to ensure we are serving and supporting as best we can.

Up this week is Jimmy Hayes (and those are his legendary kids/helpers in the photo!).


What location do you host?

Coogee, Eastern Suburbs of Sydney.

How did you find out about Mr. Perfect?

A good friend of mine who works in the NFP sector, saw what I had said having opened up on social media in relation to my own mental health challenges, in order to try to help people and friends to try to address any concerns. He knew Terry and then introduced us.

Why did you want to get involved?

After years of treatment from a variety of professionals, I am much stronger and happier, but more importantly I better understand how I need to look after myself when dealing with some of life's bigger hurdles.

I have reflected a huge amount and through this plus significant research, realised that there is a bigger challenge in Men's Mental Health. Whilst there are a number of potential factors, some that resonate with me are:

  • Traditional & cultural values - there is a perceived weakness associated with talking about personal problems, with many opting to "suck it up & keep moving forward". Ironically this is often the worst approach, which may make things worse.
  • Men do not know who to talk to if they have a serious problem. However I noticed that when I did start talking, I was amazed at how many of my friends said, "Oh, me too"!
  • Generally men in particular find it difficult to share their problems, for many reasons, this is in essence where Mr. Perfect comes in, providing a non-judgemental environment for men to have real conversations. So I offer myself as part of this solution for anybody that wants it, my only wish is for people not to go through the extent of my own mental health problems.

Favourite memory of a Meetup BBQ?

While I am still relatively new to Mr. Perfect, my favourite so far was a lady turning up by herself, who just wanted to support the good work that we were doing.

She was a pescatarian, and so was not even interested in the BBQ. But we had a lovely chat and she brought a selection of home baked cookies that were amazing. I mentioned haloumi (since I did not think that I could do fish justice on the public BBQ), so I am bringing chilli infused haloumi next time!

One piece of advice to a person debating whether to come along to a Meetup BBQ?

If you are thinking about it, you are halfway there, so come along.

There is no pressure to talk about anything, you can just listen if you wish and if you are uncomfortable for any reason then just make an excuse and leave, for example, "Sorry I can't stay, I had arranged to meet a friend".

It is an open, friendly, informal environment, it is not like an AA meeting might be, eg. standing up to introduce yourself and talking about your "problems".

Remember, most people have been there too, so they understand.


To join the Mr. Perfect Facebook Community click here.

To find a Mr. Perfect Meetup BBQ near you click here.

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